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Welcome!

On By LindaIn Uncategorized3 Comments

Welcome to Amazing God Stories!  Christian allegories, parables, analogies, fiction short stories as well as creative nonfiction stories that show the variety of amazing ways God has been working in my life. And if He has done all this for me, I can only imagine what He’s been doing for you!

My  goals are simple:

#4.  To brighten your day with a little entertainment, for you to leave feeling a bit better than when you arrived.

#3. To teach, warn, and clarify Biblical issues we face as Christians so we can be all that God calls us to be. 2 Timothy 3:16-17 All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, equipped for every good work.

#2.  To inspire you to keep on keeping on in your own walk with God.  God is working in your life as much as He’s working in mine. Maybe something I’ve learned or experienced will help you get through a rough patch or to grow in your own desire to know God.

And the #1 reason: To glorify God – to acknowledge and thank Him for all the ways He has been faithful to me! From the day I met Him, He has been by my side. He’s been my Friend, Coach, Counselor, Father, Teacher, Comforter, Defender,  Provider, and a million other things.

This blog is my way to shout to the world that GOD IS AMAZING!

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If my stories do what I hope they will do – like, comment, follow, and/or share them!

It would mean a lot to me to to know that they are being read and to hear what you think!

A Prayer for SIL, Day 4

On By LindaIn prayersLeave a comment

Jesus, I lift SIL up to You. Open her eyes and ears to see and hear You. Speak to her, Lord, of your love and mercy as You reveal her heart to her and call her to repent. I ask that you work in her to mature her, that You heal whatever is in her, whatever pain or scars or walls that keep her a perpetual child. Heal her mind, Lord, so she can live out her life fully and with satisfaction. Lord, strengthen her to look at her deep, hidden feelings and not run from them.

But I, brothers, could not address you as spiritual people but as people of the flesh, as infants in Christ. 1 Corinthians 3:1

Brothers, do not be children in your thinking. Be infants in evil, but in your thinking be mature. 1 Corinthians 14:20

Like newborn infants, long for the pure spiritual milk, that by it you may grow up into salvation, if indeed you have tasted that the Lord is good. 1 Peter 2:2

So neither he who plants nor he who waters is anything, but only God who gives the growth. 1 Corinthians 3:7

Lord, please grow SIL until You can address her as a spiritual woman and not as a woman of the flesh. I pray that she will want to be a child only in evil but mature in her thinking. I pray that she will crave pure spiritual milk so intensely that all distraction fall away as she fills herself with Your Word. Lord, Jesus, only You can make things grow. I pray that SIL will allow You to do so with her.

In Your Healing Name,

Amen.

Throw Out the Bath Water – But not the Baby

On By LindaIn My Thoughts, UncategorizedLeave a comment

With all the stuff coming out lately – the Epstein files, false prophets, immoral pastors – it seems that the people who have been speaking out against rich white males have a point. Rich and powerful men have been doing all kinds of bad things for many years. And most of these have been white.

Yet there are millions of adult white men who are nothing like these. Millions of adult white men are living decent lives. They work hard to support their families, give of themselves to their community, and share their resources with those in need. Judging all white men because of those who are doing wrong is like throwing the baby out along with the dirty bath water. Besides, there are plenty of non-white men doing evil – and it’s not limited to just men. Women can be just as evil.

We need to get rid of the evil but let’s not do so at the cost of the baby. Let’s clean up our lives so our light, which comes from Jesus, will shine in dark places and we can rightly call out the evil happening around us.

Do not judge by appearances, but judge with right judgment. John 7:24

Take no part in the unfruitful works of darkness, but instead expose them. Ephesians 5:11

But when anything is exposed by the light, it becomes visible, Ephesians 5:13

The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it. John 1:5

A Prayer for SIL, Day 3

On By LindaIn prayersLeave a comment

Lord, calm the battle that swirls in and around SIL. Open her ears to the truth so that she can be freed. Bless the efforts she makes and call her to Yourself for healing and counsel. Jesus, she needs to be rescued as much as I did when You saved me. If this battle is one of her own making in which the enemy is taking advantage, show her what she’s doing that needs to be addressed. She can’t repent if she thinks nothing is her fault. She may feel as if she’s a helpless victim but she is not. Lord, if she is being convicted by the Holy Spirit for something, I pray You strengthen and enlighten her to see it so that she can confess what needs to be confessed, be forgiven, and be set free to walk with You. Keep her safe, Lord, in all of this.

For the grace of God has appeared, bringing salvation for all people, training us to renounce ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright, and godly lives in the present age, waiting for our blessed hope, the appearing of the glory of our great God and Savior Jesus Christ, who gave himself for us to redeem us from all lawlessness and to purify for himself a people for his own possession who are zealous for good works. Titus 2:11-14

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.1 John 1:9

Lord God, I pray that Your grace will bring salvation to SIL, that You train her to renounce ungodliness and worldly passions and enable her to live a self-controlled, upright, and godly life in these troublesome times as she waits for Your glorious appearing. Jesus, You gave Yourself to redeem us – I pray that you redeem SIL from all lawlessness, and that You purify her for Yourself to be zealous for good works.

In You Glorious Name,

Amen.

A Prayer for SIL, Day 2

On By LindaIn prayersLeave a comment

Jesus, be with SIL as she sleeps. Give her a sense of Your presence. Counsel her. Show her what she needs to win the battle she is in. Clarify her vision and open her ears. Protect her from the enemy. Free her from her past. Show her her need for help, her need for other people, her need to look at herself, and her need of Your strength. Pour your grace over and through her. Heal her heart and her mind. Grow her faith so that she can mature in You. Make her to be the woman You call her to be.

I bless the Lord who gives me counsel; in the night also my heart instructs me.   Psalm 16:7

May she hear you as You speak to her in the night. Fill her heart with knowledge of who You are, what she needs to do, and what she needs to let go of. When she awakes, I pray she feels Your presence and will use the strength that comes from You to do the things You placed in her heart.

In Your Most Precious Name,

Amen.

Prayer for a Struggling Loved One – Day One

On By LindaIn prayersLeave a comment

Most Christians have no trouble praying for the needs of someone who is struggling. Words seem to flow from them no matter how often they pray.

Not so with me. I tend to pray very short prayers, and once prayed, don’t see the need to repeat them. God heard me. God will handle the situation. What else is there to say?

But recently I have found a situation that requires daily prayer. Several people I know are in intense battles for their minds, souls, finances, relationships, and health. A one-time prayer doesn’t seem to fit anymore.  And yet, I am unable to repeat myself every day without it becoming rote and passionless.  

I wonder how many Christians can identify with me.

For those who have no problem praying verbally, this series of blogs is not intended for you, although you may certainly read and pray them, too. This set of blogs is for those who struggle to find the words. As I work to put into words the yearning of my heart for my loved ones, I hope posting them will empower others to pray for their own struggling loved ones easier and more faithfully. May the Lord use our prayers to free His people from the battles that bind them.

(I will refer to the person I’m praying for as SIL – Someone I Love – in these posts. But when I pray, I use their real names. It would be good if you did the same.)

Day One

Lord, I lift up SIL to You. Please calm the storm around her so she can see. So she can hear Your words to her. Help her to fight. Strengthen her and show her who the enemy is. Whatever is in her, whatever pain or confusion or pride that is controlling her thoughts and reactions – and her silence and passive aggressiveness – I pray You break through and free her as You freed me. Not because I want it, though I do. Not because she needs it, though she does. But because You love her and died to set her free. Protect her from all forces trying to destroy her. Protect her from demonic thoughts as she fights her own flesh. Fill her with your Spirit. Let Your light illuminate the issues she’s struggling with. And let Your strength bolster her enough to have victory in this battle.

For God, who said, “Let light shine out of darkness,” has shone in our hearts to give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ.  2 Corinthians 4:6

Scripture paraphrased:

May You, O God, who said, “Let light shine out of darkness,” shine in the SIL’s heart to give her the light of the knowledge of Your glory in the face of Jesus Christ.

For it is in Jesus we find freedom.

Amen.

Wedding Vows Can Be Hazardous to Your Marriage Part 5 Biblical Marriage Vows

On By LindaIn My ThoughtsLeave a comment

A vow is a solemn, voluntary, one-party promise, usually to God, to perform a specific action.

On the other hand, a covenant is a formal, binding, and often unconditional agreement between two or more parties – marriage; God and His people – often involving long-term, mutual commitment.

Would we take our wedding vows more seriously if we were to sit together and draw up a covenant instead of reciting some vows?  How would that sound?

Maybe like this…

We enter into this marriage in order to walk together through life as one flesh, joined together until death. We look to Jesus, who holds all things together, to meet our needs and to help and council us as we seek His Kingdom first.

I, (groom), will love you, (bride), as Jesus loved the church. I will give myself up for you, nourishing and cherishing you as I do my own body.  I will treat you with gentleness and understanding, and honor you as a fellow heir.

I, (bride), I will love and respect you, (groom), as my spiritual head and submit myself to you as to the Lord. I will adorn myself with a gentle and quiet spirit.

We will love each other, not as defined by the world but as defined in 1 Corinthians 13. We will do nothing from selfish desires, but will, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bear with each other in love as we pursue the peace and unity of the Spirit. We will apologize when we fail, forgive as Christ forgives us, pray for each other, and use the gifts we have received from the Holy Spirit to build each other up.

This covenant or set of vows, which elaborates om and paints a clearer picture of the traditional “to have and to hold” vows, would help us think seriously about entering into marriage, and set clear expectations.. It won’t be easy to keep but being Biblical; it comes with the promise that God will help us. It is also easy to find. I made my vows more than forty years ago, and I can’t remember now anything I said that day. But if I had made a covenant such as the one above, I wouldn’t have to try to remember. It would be right there in the Bible to read as often as I needed to.

It’s too late for those of us who have already made unrealistic or vague vows we can’t, haven’t, or have trouble keeping. But what if we recommitted to each other with a new, God-powered covenant? How would that affect our marriages going into the future?

It might be worth a try.

Scriptures (there are a lot of them)

But from the beginning of creation, ‘God made them male and female.’  ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, 8and the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two but one flesh.  What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.” Mark 10:6-9

If a man vows a vow to the Lord, or swears an oath to bind himself by a pledge, he shall not break his word. He shall do according to all that proceeds out of his mouth. Numbers 30:2

When you vow a vow to God, do not delay paying it, for he has no pleasure in fools. Pay what you vow. It is better that you should not vow than that you should vow and not pay. Let not your mouth lead you into sin, and do not say before the messenger that it was a mistake. Why should God be angry at your voice and destroy the work of your hands? Ecclesiastes 5:4-6

And he is before all things, and in him all things hold together. Colossians 1:17

And my God will meet all of your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19

Seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. Matthew 6:33

Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Isiah 41:10

I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you with my eye upon you. Psalm 32:8

Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.  For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior.  Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her,  that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word,  so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.  For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, because we are members of his body.  “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.”  This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.  However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband. Ephesians 5:22-33

Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, when they see your respectful and pure conduct.  Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious.  For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, 6as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening.1 Peter 3:1-5

Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered. 1 Peter 3:7

Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them. Colossians 3:18-19

Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ. Colossians 3:23-24

Looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God. Hebrews 12:2

Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Philippians 2:3

To each is given the manifestation of the Spirit for the common good. 1 Corinthians 12:7

Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working James 5:16

With all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. Ephesians 4:2-3

Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. Ephesians 4:32

Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working. James 5:16

And God is able to make all grace abound toward you; that you, always having all sufficiency in all things, may abound in every good work… 2 Corinthians 9:8

Wedding Vows Can Be Hazardous to Your Marriage Part 4 Marriage God’s Way

On By LindaIn My ThoughtsLeave a comment

The Bible has a lot to say about marriage. When to get married, when not to get married, why get married, the roles of each spouse, and how to treat each other. Based on this, marriage must be either important to God or problematic for people. I think it’s both.

Marriage is important to God because it is a picture of Jesus’ relationship with us, His church. The love and faithfulness, service and fellowship that He gives and wants in return is how He planned marriages to be – with one big difference: He is faithful even when we are not.

Marriage is problematic for people for two reasons. One is because we are generally self-centered. Whether we realize it or not, we live as if the world revolves around us. If we go into marriage with this mindset, we will eventually feel let down or betrayed.

The other reason is our expectations. We may serve people for a time – food banks, mission trips, volunteer opportunities – not expecting much in return. We may look to others – friends, family, nonprofits, government – to meet our needs knowing they may not always be able to. But we tend to expect more out of our spouses even though they have the same weaknesses as everyone else. Could that higher expectation be part of the reason?

In biblical marriages we are encouraged to treat each other as Jesus treats us – not as we treat each other. We are encouraged to look to Jesus to fill all our needs – not expect our spouse to carry that load. We are encouraged to forgive each other like Jesus forgives us – daily, without holding a grudge, and without keeping score. And we are encouraged to serve each other, to think of our spouse over our own desires – like Jesus did for us when He lived and died for us.

What would happen if we entered into a marriage with these goals in mind? How would our vows be shaped by these goals?

 That’s what I will explore in the final part, Part 5.

Scriptures

For your Maker is your husband, the LORD of hosts is his name Isaiah 54:5a  

For your Maker is your husband, the Lord of hosts is his name; and the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer, the God of the whole earth he is called. Isaiah 54:5 

 “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.”This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. Ephesians 5:31-32

Let us rejoice and exult and give him the glory, for the marriage of the Lamb has come, and his Bride has made herself ready; it was granted her to clothe herself with fine linen, bright and pure”— for the fine linen is the righteous deeds of the saints. And the angel said to me, “Write this: Blessed are those who are invited to the marriage supper of the Lamb.” And he said to me, “These are the true words of God.” Revelation 19:7-9

I am jealous for you with a godly jealousy. I promised you to one husband, Christ, so that I might present you as a pure virgin to him. 2 Corinthians 11:2

Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous. Heb 13:4

Husbands love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctity her, having cleansed her by the washing of water and the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. Ephesians 5:25-27

Wedding Vows Can Be Hazardous to Your Marriage Part 3 Statistics

On By LindaIn My ThoughtsLeave a comment

The good news is that the divorce rate in the US is declining. However, the marriage rate is also declining. (See statistics at the end of this blog.) More people are waiting until late in life or never to get married. Many of these people are living with someone instead of marrying them. When these relationships break up, the number is not added to the divorce rate since they were never married. But that doesn’t mean they weren’t experiencing the same difficulties of a married couple. The number of couples (married and unmarried) seeking marriage counseling instead of jumping into divorce is increasing which is also lowering the divorce rate.

The bad news is that the divorce rate is still high. Some put it at almost 50%. And sadly, Christian marriages do not have better numbers. In fact, Christians are slightly more likely to divorce than nonChristians. (see statistics at the end of this blog.)

This is not what Jesus intended for us. He gave us through His Word the dos and don’ts of marriages and the power of the Holy Spirit to live it out. So why aren’t we? I think that our wedding vows may have something to do with it.

We often make unbiblical and unrealistic promises that form a vision of what life together will look like. It sets our expectations high – too high for most people to keep long term. Then we get hurt, disappointed, disillusioned. It’s even worse when we compare our marriage to those in movies, books, social media, and in the couples around us. We start thinking about our marriage and think, “This is not what it’s supposed to be.” My spouse is not as romantic as the one in the movie last night, doesn’t provide for all my desires like the one in the book I just finished reading, and doesn’t serve me breakfast in bed on our anniversary like my friend’s spouse does. This is not the life I signed up for.

What we often don’t look at is how we tend to treat our spouses the way they treat us, often misinterpreting their motives and actions. If asked, our spouse may make the same complaints about us and come to the same conclusion about our marriage as we did. Many couples at this point decide to call it quits. But it doesn’t have to be this way.

In Part 4 we’ll take a look at marriage from a Christian perspective.

Some statistics for those who are interested in such things:

Wilkinson and Finkbeiner  (https://www.wf-lawyers.com/divorce-statistics-and-facts/)

As of 2021, both marriage rates AND divorce rates in the US are decreasing – with the marriage rate dropping from 8.2 per 1,ooo people in 2000 to 6.1 and the divorce rate from 4.0 in 2000 to 2.7. The breakdown shows that almost 50 percent of all marriages in the US will end in divorce or separation. 41 percent of first marriages, 60 percent of second marriages, and 73 percent of third marriages will end in divorce. The US has the 6th highest divorce rate in the world

Why are people divorcing? According to the Wilkinson and Finkbeiner, a recent national survey showed that lack of commitment is the most common reason.  Other reasons are:

  • Lack of commitment 73%
  • Argue too much 56%
  • Infidelity 55%
  • Married too young 46%
  • Unrealistic expectations 45%
  • Lack of equality in the relationship 44%
  • Lack of preparation for marriage 41%
  • Domestic Violence or Abuse 25%

(Respondents often cited more that one reason, therefore the percentages add up to much more than 100 percent)

Barna (https://www.barna.com/trends/marriage-divorce-trends-2025/)

Christians—even practicing Christians, who regularly attend church and say their faith is important to them—are as likely as other adults to say they have gone through divorce.

  • 20% nonpracticing Christians
  • 16% practicing Christians  
  • 16% non-Christians

My Denver Therapy (https://mydenvertherapy.com/couples-therapy-statistics/)

  • Almost 50% of married couples have gone to counseling at some point in their relationship. 
  • The median couple starts couples therapy about 4 years into the relationship. The highest percentage of couples in marriage counseling have been married between 3 and 5 years. Many say they wish they didn’t wait so long to start.
  • About 75% of couples who go to counseling see an improvement in their relationship, and 90% see an improvement in their physical or mental health. One study had 99% of couples currently in therapy say that it had a positive impact on their relationship. 

Scriptures

Listen to advice and accept instruction, that you may gain wisdom in the future. Proverbs 19:20

Wedding Vows Can Be Hazardous to Your Marriage Part 2 Saying the Quiet Part Out Loud

On By LindaIn My ThoughtsLeave a comment

Have you ever stopped to really consider the promises being recited at a wedding? What if we could see into the future and then recite our vows with that in mind. What if we said the quiet part out loud? In the world, it might sound like this.

I take you…

to have and to hold, (except when you make me mad or when I am too tired or when you come in from cutting the grass all dirty and smelly or before you brush your teeth in the morning…)

 in good times and bad, (except when the bad times make you irritable, angry, or depressed or are happening because you did something stupid)

for richer and for poorer, (except when you spend all our money and max out the credit cards or because you lost your job and have many excuses why you can’t find another one…)

in sickness and in health. (except when it causes me to become your caretaker, like if you became paralyzed from an accident or developed dementia or an autoimmune disease…)

I promise to be faithful to you (as long as you are faithful to me and you keep up your appearances and you fulfill all my desires…)

and stand beside you in all things. (except when doing so will cause me to be too uncomfortable or when it cuts into my personal time)

I promise to keep laughing with you, (until your jokes get so old that all I can do is groan)

crying with you, (after the first few dozen times, you’re on your own)

and never stop finding new ways to make you smile. (except when you stop finding new ways to make me smile)

I will love, (until the emotion goes away)

honor, (as long as you are honorable and do the right things)

and cherish you (except when I take you for granted because I’m too busy thinking about myself)

all the days of our lives. (maybe most of the days, but the nights are mine)

In Part 3, we’ll take a look at some statistics.

Scriptures:

For nothing is hidden that will not be made manifest, nor is anything secret that will not be known and come to light. Luke 8:17 

Do not devise evil in your hearts against one another, and love no false oath, for all these things I hate, declares the Lord.”  Zechariah 8:17

See to it that no one takes you captive by philosophy and empty deceit, according to human tradition, according to the elemental spirits of the world, and not according to Christ. Colossians 2:8

And you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” John 8:32

Wedding Vows Can Be Hazardous to Your Marriage Part 1 Overview

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We’ve all heard them. Sweet, love filled promises from one person to another before saying “I do.”  Some are serious, others are humorous. Some are long, some are short. Some are read from papers in trembling fingers, others are recited from the heart. But they all have one thing in common: the person saying them truly believes what they are saying. And usually, so does the recipient.

The promises in wedding vows – to always be there, to support, to respect, love, and encourage each other, etc. – are not in themselves bad. It’s okay to say and pursue them, but when we put our hope and trust in them, it can create expectations that might not be sustainable. What happens when jobs are lost, spouses lie or cheat, life goals change and conflict with each other, and love grows cold? What happens to the marriage when these wonderful-sounding expectations aren’t met?

Another problem in many wedding vows is that they are self-focused. “I love you because you make me feel good.” I love you because you encourage me with I’m feeling down.” I love how your smile lights up my heart.” If a person goes into a marriage with the expectation that their spouse fills their needs, what happens when the spouse gets sick or depressed or busy or overwhelmed – and can no longer meet these needs?

Third, vows are usually easy to keep in the early years. Then children arrive. And jobs are lost. And illnesses rage. And interests change. And more children arrive. And temptations sneak in. The promises made in the beginning are forgotten in the stress of managing busy lives. What used to makes us smile about the other becomes buried under layers of disappointments, failures, and age-related physical and mental changes.  We trusted that our partner would make our lives better and be there when things were tough. But as the years go by, little by little, one small failure after another, resentment and accusations can slowly creep into our hearts – and often out of our mouths. “You promised to make me smile every day! Well, I’m not smiling now as you play golf leaving me to struggle with our bills.”

The high divorce rate in this country, even in Christian marriages, is evidence of broken promises and unfilled expectations.

So should we set up our marriages to fail from the beginning by making promises we can’t keep? There are many warnings in the Bible about keeping vows made to God, and I would think that vows made in the deliberate presence of God would carry a similar weight. So, should vows be eliminated from a wedding?

No, I don’t think so. But I do think they should be changed.

  • Promises of what you will do in the future? You don’t know what the future holds.
  • Reasons why you love the person you’re marrying? Those reasons may become moot as your spouse changes.
  • Ways your feel loved by your future spouse? Those reasons may become buried under the concerns and burdens of everyday life.

It’s okay to describe when you knew you wanted to get married or how the other person makes you feel in the present. It’s okay to state what you want to do in the future for the other person. But none of these should be promises. Instead, what if we focused on what God will do? He’s the only one who can fulfill all of His promises and meet all of our needs.

What if a wedding vow sounded more like this:

I love you and want to spend the rest of my life with you. I want to be with you in good times and bad. I want to help you when you are down, and celebrate with you when you are up. I want to support you, grow with you, and live your dreams with you. The best way I know to accomplish this is by the strength and help that God gives me. Therefore, I promise to always keep God the center of our marriage. I promise to abide in Jesus so that I will be able to love you with the love and strength He provides. I promise to obey God’s word as it relates to marriage, and to be accountable to you for that. I promise to pray for you and for our marriage each day. Looking to Jesus to strengthen me, equip me, counsel me, and to meet all my needs, I will be free to serve you without expecting anything back. I will be free to love you as you are and as you will be as you grow and change. Together, with Jesus, I look forward to walking into the future with you.

Stay tuned for Part 2 – saying the quiet part out loud.

Scriptures:

Come now, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go into such and such a town and spend a year there and trade and make a profit” – yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring. What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a time and then vanishes. Instead you ought to say, “If the Lord will, we will live and do this or that.” As it is, you boast in your arrogance. All such boasting is evil. So whoever knows the right thing to do and fails to do it, for him it is sin. James 4:13-17

And he is before all things, and in him all things hold together. Colossians 1:17

And my God will meet all of your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19

Seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. Matthew 6:33

Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Isiah 41:10

I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you with my eye upon you. Psalm 32:8

The Lord is good, a stronghold in the day of trouble; he knows those who take refuge in him. Nahum 1:7

Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me. I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing. John 15:4-5

Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect. Romans 12:2

His divine power has granted to us all things that pertain to life and godliness, through the knowledge of him who called us to his own glory and excellence… 2 Peter 1:3

And God is able to make all grace abound toward you; that you, always having all sufficiency in all things, may abound in every good work… 2 Corinthians 9:8

As for the rich in this present age, charge them not to be haughty, nor to set their hopes on the uncertainty of riches, but on God, who richly provides us with everything to enjoy. 1 Timothy 6:17

Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working. James 5:16