Life is Like Enlarging a Fish Pond, Part 17 The Net

My heart dropped at the sight of the dead fish laying on the rocks outside the pond. How did it get there? There was no way it could jump high enough to clear the sides of the pond. It must have been carried there. What could do that to a fish? I had never seen a possum or raccoon in my yard in the three years I’ve lived here so I doubt it was one  of them. A toad might try to eat one but wouldn’t be able to jump up out of the pond with one in its mouth. Even if it did, it wouldn’t just leave it once it started eating it. It had to be a bird. One of the many that live around the area, many of which eat fish.

I imagined a bird swooping down, grabbing a fish, and then accidently dropping it as it flew away. No way was that going to happen again, not if I can help it. I don’t care that other people say it’s just the circle of life and that if I want a pond with fish, I should let nature take its course. My heart is for my fish. They didn’t ask to be easy prey contained in my small pond. I’m the one who set them there. And I’m going to protect them.

I grieved for the lifeless fish in my hand. It had survived two winters under snow and ice, two hot summers when the water temperature rose to bath water temp, the recent traumatizing chase and capture in a net, and a temporary stay in a plastic tub. And now it was dead. Captured by the enemy. Dropped and forgotten. I buried it in my raised garden bed. At least it’s death is not wasted. And then I covered my pond with a large net. It may not look as pretty, but it’s much safer for my fish.

God chose the Israelites to be His. With the call of Abraham, He set them in place. His heart was for His people and He protected them.  There were other nations, but this is the one He focused on.

The Bible talks about people being protected under the shadow of God’s wings. Birds have wings. Angels have wings. Somehow I don’t think God actually has wings, although I could be wrong. I think God was using the same imagery Jesus used when He cried over Jerusalem“O Jerusalem, Jerusalem, the city that kills the prophets and stones those who are sent to it! How often would I have gathered your children together as a hen gathers her brood under her wings, and you were not willing! Matthew 23:37

No one likes to be confined. We all long for freedom, which is what God created in us when He created Adam. The Bible doesn’t explicitly say that but it seems if Adam and Eve were told to go forth and dominate the world, that that was a lot of freedom. But sin entered the world and through disobedience Adam and Eve lost that freedom. There was an enemy now that wanted them and their offspring dead. And so God set His wings over the Israelites just like I set a net over my fish pond. As long as the Israelites stayed where He set them by loving and obeying Him, they were safe. But if they strayed out from under it through disobedience, they were easy prey for those who sought to harm them.

The net is not pretty. It was not what I wanted for my pond. But it is necessary at this time.

God’s laws may feel confining. They may not be what He wanted for mankind. But they are necessary at this time.

Instead of complaining about His commandments, maybe we should thank Him for setting His heart on us and protecting us from things we can’t see.


Scriptures:

And he said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.  This is the great and first commandment.  And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself.  On these two commandments depend all the Law and the Prophets.” Matthew 22:37-40

 “See, I have set before you today life and good, death and evil.  If you obey the commandments of the Lord your God that I command you today, by loving the Lord your God, by walking in his ways, and by keeping his commandments and his statutes and his rule, then you shall live and multiply, and the Lord your God will bless you in the land that you are entering to take possession of it.  But if your heart turns away, and you will not hear, but are drawn away to worship other gods and serve them, I declare to you today, that you shall surely perish. You shall not live long in the land that you are going over the Jordan to enter and possess.  I call heaven and earth to witness against you today, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and curse. Therefore choose life, that you and your offspring may live, loving the Lord your God, obeying his voice and holding fast to him, for he is your life and length of days, that you may dwell in the land that the Lord swore to your fathers, to Abraham, to Isaac, and to Jacob, to give them.” Deuteronomy 30:15-20

How precious is your steadfast love, O God! The children of mankind take refuge in the shadow of your wings. They feast on the abundance of your house, and you give them drink from the river of your delights. For with you is the fountain of life;
in your light do we see light.
Psalm 36:7-9

Then God said, “Let us make man in our image, after our likeness. And let them have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over the livestock and over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.” Genesis 1:26

Behold, to the LORD your God belong heaven and the heaven of heavens, the earth with all that is in it. Yet the LORD set his heart in love on your fathers and chose their offspring after them, you above all peoples, as you are this day. Circumcise therefore the foreskin of your heart, and be no longer stubborn. Deuteronomy 10:14-16

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places, even as he chose us in him before the foundations of the world, that we should be holy and blameless before him, in love. Ephesians 1:3-4

“Because he holds fast to me in love, I will deliver him; I will protect him, because he knows my name. Psalm 91:14

A Prayer for SIL, Day 69

Lord, she confuses me. But I know she doesn’t confuse you. Speak to her. Show her what You see when You look at her. Show her Your love and the places she holds back from You. Renew her spirit with a fresh outpouring of Your Spirit into her heart and mind.

Again Joel 2:38 comes to mind – I will pour out my Spirit on all flesh…

She is flesh and lives in the flesh – and so greatly needs Your Spirit with all His healing, instruction, and comfort. May SIL respond to Your call the way the disciples did – giving up their old lives for new lives with You. And may she fall in love with You again – may she return to her first love.

In Your Wise Name,

Amen.

A Prayer for SIL, Day 30

Jesus, King of hope, I pray that You fill SIL with the hope she needs to see what she needs to see. I pray that as she opens her eyes, she is not filled with despair but with Your love, grace, and mercy.

And everyone who thus hopes in him purifies himself as he is pure. 1 John 3:3

Jesus, as SIL puts her hope in You, may she purify herself as You are pure.

Now may our Lord Jesus Christ himself, and God our Father, who loved us and gave us eternal comfort and good hope through grace, comfort your hearts and establish them in every good work and word. 2 Thessalonians 2:16-17

Jesus, may You Yourself, and God our Father, who loves SIL and gave her eternal comfort and good hope though grace, comfort her heart and establish it in every good work and word.

In Your Comforting Name,

Amen.

A Prayer for SIL, Day 29

Dear Lord, just as You hold Your people in Your heart, hold SIL. Let the love You have for her overflow in her heart and mind.

Therefore thus says the LORD God: Now I will restore the fortunes of Jacob and have mercy on the whole house of Israel, and I will be jealous for my holy name. They shall forget their shame and all the treachery they have practiced against me, when they dwell securely in their land with none to make them afraid, when I have brought them back from the people and gathered them from their enemies’ lands, and through them have vindicated my holiness in the sight of many nations. Ezekiel 39:25-27

Father God, I pray that You restore the riches of Your love in SIL and have mercy on her whole being, and that You will be jealous for her, not for anything she has done but for Your Name’s sake. I pray that SIL forgets her shame and all the sins she has committed against You, just as You did when she repented of them. May she dwell securely in the land You give her as You bring her back from the enemy’s grasp. Vindicate Your holiness in the sight of all who know her and see Your light reflected in her.

In Your Merciful Name,

Amen.

A Prayer for SIL, Day 28

Lord Jesus, Master Healer and Friend, be both to SIL. Fill her with Your presence. Restore to her the joy of her salvation. Feed her Your Word and open her eyes, ears, and heart to receive it. Surround her with Your angels to keep the enemy away. And grant her peace as You still her fears of the future.

My son, eat honey, for it is good, and the drippings of the honeycomb are sweet to your taste.
Know that wisdom is such to your soul; if you find it, there will be a future, and your hope will not be cut off.
Proverbs 24:13-14

How sweet are your words to my taste, sweeter than honey to my mouth! Psalm 119:103

Lord, I pray that SIL eats Your Word, finds wisdom, and rests in Your promise of a future. Let her find Your sweet Word addictive and begin to crave it above all else.

In Your Sweet Name,

Amen.

A Prayer for SIL, Day 27

Dear Lord, I know SIL is awake when she should be sleeping. Whatever she’s battling that is keeping her in turmoil, I pray You are right there with her. Let her feel Your presence and to take hope in Your love. Speak words of knowledge and discernment to her so she can see what she had been running from. Heal her from the damage life has done to her, and free her from the lies she believes.

And you will know the truth and the truth will set you free. John 8:32

May she know the truth and be set free.

In the Name of the God of Hope,

Amen.

A Prayer for SIL Day 8

Lord, heal SIL. Free her from past hurts, issues, and behavior that have caused her to be locked into where she is. Remove the chains that bind her so that she can grow up and not be shaken in every storm. Enable and call her to mature in You. Give her peace and assurance that You love her. Remove her guilt and shame that is interfering with her spiritual health, as well as her physical and mental stability, and fill those spaces with Your Spirit.

Oh, restore me to health and make me live! Isaiah 38:16b

Jesus, I ask that you restore her to health and make her live. Give her hope and enthusiasm for the life You’ve given her. Walk with her each day, whispering assurances and comfort as You lead her to take steps she has never taken before.

In Your Comforting Name,

Amen.

A Prayer for SIL, Day 6

Jesus, Master Healer, Binder of the Brokenhearted, I pray you reveal Yourself to SIL. Your word says You heal the brokenhearted and bind up their wounds.

He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds. Psalm 147:3

I pray you do so now for SIL. I pray that You heal her heart and free her from her past. Unbind her need to think only happy thoughts. Remove her fear of negative emotions. Free her to be who You created her to be. Make her into the woman You call her to be. Manifest Your love within her. Remove the guilt she lives with. Strengthen her to stop doing the things that add to that guilt. Open her eyes to see herself as you see her so she can find strength in your arms as she lets go of all she needs to.

“The Spirit of the Lord is upon me, because he has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim liberty to the captives and recovering of sight to the blind, to set at liberty those who are oppressed, to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor.” Luke 4:18-19

Proclaim good news to SIL. Proclaim liberty to her for she is being held captive by things unseen. Restore her sight and set her free from the things that are oppressing her. Let this be the year of Your favor on her.

In Your Liberating Name,

Amen.

A Prayer for SIL, Day 4

Jesus, I lift SIL up to You. Open her eyes and ears to see and hear You. Speak to her, Lord, of your love and mercy as You reveal her heart to her and call her to repent. I ask that you work in her to mature her, that You heal whatever is in her, whatever pain or scars or walls that keep her a perpetual child. Heal her mind, Lord, so she can live out her life fully and with satisfaction. Lord, strengthen her to look at her deep, hidden feelings and not run from them.

But I, brothers, could not address you as spiritual people but as people of the flesh, as infants in Christ. 1 Corinthians 3:1

Brothers, do not be children in your thinking. Be infants in evil, but in your thinking be mature. 1 Corinthians 14:20

Like newborn infants, long for the pure spiritual milk, that by it you may grow up into salvation, if indeed you have tasted that the Lord is good. 1 Peter 2:2

So neither he who plants nor he who waters is anything, but only God who gives the growth. 1 Corinthians 3:7

Lord, please grow SIL until You can address her as a spiritual woman and not as a woman of the flesh. I pray that she will want to be a child only in evil but mature in her thinking. I pray that she will crave pure spiritual milk so intensely that all distraction fall away as she fills herself with Your Word. Lord, Jesus, only You can make things grow. I pray that SIL will allow You to do so with her.

In Your Healing Name,

Amen.

He’s Not Like That

He’s Not Like That  

Short story based on a dream  2-12-20

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“I felt bad that my faith was not stronger, but I didn’t condemn myself over it,” I assured the older lady sitting next to me. “I know God is a forgiving God, and He understands my struggles.”

“That’s good. You didn’t know God then like you know Him now.” Vanda smiled at me.

“I’ve also discovered that one reason it was so hard for me to trust God when I first started walking with Him was because I was looking at Him like I looked at my earthly father. I think it might be the same with others. How we see God the Father is affected by how we see our earthly fathers.”

“That’s great insight. You need to share your story at our next meeting. People will be encouraged by that.”

I considered it, and then agreed. God had done so many things for me; it was time for me to do something for Him.

For the next few days I pictured myself telling a room full of people how I had come to know God.  I was excited that my story would touch so many people. Maybe it would have great impact in their lives, freeing them to see God as He really is, and enabling them to receive the steadfast love He has for them.

Only it didn’t turn out that way. When the meeting started, there were only four of us. An older man and his wife, Vanda, and me. I was disappointed, but I had agreed, and so I began.

“I was raised in a devout Catholic family. That becomes important later on. We moved frequently through my early childhood. Life changed about the time I entered fifth grade, when we moved away from our large extended family. A few years later my dad lost his job, and got moody. He became increasingly critical and judgmental towards us and towards church. We went to church each week, but it was more of a ritual than anything else. To me it was just bunch of rules that was supposed to bring us close to God, to make us pleasing to Him. There was no life in that but I gave it my best shot during my early teen years, becoming very religious with lots of rosaries and masses. I felt no closer to God and church was too cold for me, so as soon as I could, I quit going.

Life was painful. Broken relationships, confusion, and a extremely poor self-concept resulted in a deep depression that grew deeper throughout my teen years. After high school graduation, when things got as bad as they could get, I gave up. I knew I could not help myself, so I asked God for help before crying myself to sleep at night. But during the days, I ran from anything to do with Him. It was like a game of tag, and He wasn’t going to let me get away. He set me up to have an encounter with Him during a movie I pretty much felt forced to watch. He changed my life, and I began to walk with Him.

He did so many small things – constantly doing things – to show me He loved me. I look back and can’t believe how much trouble I had trusting Him. I know now that it was because I was viewing Him though the lens of the various glasses I was wearing.

One was my father-lens. My dad’s inconsistent attitude towards me – acceptance one day, rejection the next – led me to believe God’s attitude would also be inconsistent. Sure, He loved me on those days when He did something for me. But what about the other days?  And what about when I disappointed Him?

I had a church-lens. The church’s focus on rules and rituals influenced how I viewed God. Things had to be done in the correct way or God wouldn’t be pleased.

And then I had the me-lens. I saw God the way I saw myself. When I was feeling happy about myself. God was happy with me, too. I was acceptable to Him. But I was not acceptable to Him on my bad days any more than I accepted myself on those days.

That was years ago. Many years of struggling to get past those lenses to see God as He really was.  And now…” I paused. I was going to say I no longer struggled. But was that true? I had to be honest. Honest with myself; and honest with these people, as few as they were.

“And now it’s the same. Only different. Deeper. I no longer question whether God loves me. But is He taking care of me when things look bad, and I can’t see Him working?  I no longer believe we have to follow a bunch of rules and rituals in order to get close to God. But am I saying the right words when fighting the enemy? I no longer believe God sees me as I see myself. But I find myself running away from Him when I’m feeling bad instead of running to Him, thinking I’m not acceptable when feeling that way. I guess I haven’t really gotten past my lenses. I just put God’s lens over mine.”  I sat down, disappointed in myself.

No one spoke for a few minutes.

“Well, don’t feel bad. We are all wearing our own lenses under God’s lens.” Vanda said. “It’s okay. God understands.”

“I know,” I responded glumly. “I just don’t like that they’re there.”

“Then get rid of them.”

Get rid of them? Easier said than done.  “How do I do that? I’ve tried for years, and yet they are still there.”

“I’ve heard if you don’t use them, they will slowly shrink away until they are gone.”

I brightened. “That’s it! I’ll just choose not to use them!”

Over the next week I had plenty of opportunities to choose. And I devised a process to help me intentionally look through God’s lens instead of mine. I couldn’t wait to get back to the group to share it.

Finally it was time.

“Remember last week when we talked about choosing which lens to look through? I figured out how to make that work for me. I hope it works for you, too.

The first thing I did was identify which lens I was looking through whenever I thought about God. Often when a doubt sneaks into my mind, it comes as a vague, uncertain feeling. It’s like trying to look through two lenses at the same time. Things get blurry. So putting that feeling into words helped clarify the thought. And that helped identify the lens. If it was a dad-lens, religious- lens, or a me-lens, I made the conscious choice replace it with a God-lens. I reminded myself He was not like that, and replaced the faulty thought with truth from the Bible.

Here are some thoughts I’ve had this week, and how I handled them.

 

“God won’t help me if the problem is my fault.”

He’s not like that.

Hebrews 4:16  Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.

 

God’s love is conditional on what I do or don’t do. If I skip my Bible reading, He will withhold His love”.

He’s not like that

2 Timothy 2:13 If we are faithless, he remains faithful – for he cannot deny himself.

 

“God criticizes me for my failures.”

He’s not like that

Romans 8:1  There is therefore no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.

 

“God makes promises, but He doesn’t always keep them.”

He’s not that

Numbers 23:19 God is not man, that he should lie, or a son of man, that he should change his mind. Has he said, and will he not do it? Or has he spoken, and will he not fulfill it?

 

“God doesn’t understand me.”

He’s not like that

Psalm 139:1 O LORD, you have searched me and know me!”

 

“God will get angry at me when I deliberately misbehave”.

He’s not like that

Exodus 34:6 The LORD passed before him and proclaimed, “The LORD, the LORD, a God merciful and gracious, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love and faithfulness.

 

“God is too busy with His own plans to get involved in the smaller things in my life.”

He’s not like that

Philippians 4:6  Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.

 

“God is far away, watching from a distance to see how I handle things in my day to day life.”

He’s not like that

James 4:8a Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you.

 

“God is punitive, quick to administer punishment for my mistakes.”

He’s not like that

2 Peter 3:9 The Lord is not slow to fulfill his promise as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing that any should perish, but that all should reach repentance.

 

“God is not concerned about my mental health.”

He’s not like that

3 John 1:2  Beloved, I pray that all may go well with you and that you may be in good health, as it goes well with your soul.

 

“God does not care about what I care about.”

He’s not like that

1 Peter 5:7 casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you

 

“God expects too much from us. We can’t do it all.”

He’s not like that

2 Corinthians 9:8  God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that having all sufficiency in all things at all times, you may abound in every good work.

 

“God may or may not hear me when I call to Him.”

He’s not like that

Psalm 34:17  When the righteous cry for help, the LORD hears and delivers them out of all their troubles.

 

“God can get impatient and cranky.”

He’s not like that

1 Corinthians 13: Love is patient, and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it’s not irritable or resentful.

 

“As you can see,” I told the group. “The enemy is busy planting seeds every day. But we don’t have to let them grow. God’s Word is a powerful way to combat those seeds before they can grow into a lens. The bottom line is this: God loves you better than you know. He completely accepts you as you are, delights in you, and wants only good for you. Even when you stray or give in to sin, He is quick to forgive when you ask because of His great love for You. You can’t do anything to lessen that love, or anything to increase it. Once you grasp that, doubts will no longer be a problem.”

I sat back down, leaving them to reflect on what I had just shared. And then from deep inside, I heard the Lord whisper, “Are you listening?”