If my back yard could talk, this might be what it would say as I dig away in it again.

Wait! Why are you removing more of my dirt?  Wasn’t that big hole enough? Besides, it doesn’t feel good for you to dig and scrape away at me like you are doing. What was hidden under my top layer is now exposed and it makes me feel open and raw. Maybe you have a good reason to remove the dry, bare clay, although I haven’t given up trying to grow something in those areas. But why take away the rich, dark soil in other areas? That soil is so promising. It’s just a matter of time for those tiny green grass blades to grow and become a lush covering. And what about the grass you are removing with the dirt? You call them weeds, but they are just as green as the grass you value. I just don’t understand why you are doing this. Sure, I said the same thing last month when you dug that big hole. But I can now see how it serves a good purpose, providing a home for fish, frogs, and tadpoles. But I see no purpose in what you are doing here. It makes no sense to remove the dirt you are but leaving the rest. And in those narrow bands! Just look at how much I’m losing. It makes me sad to see tubs full of my dirt that you are taking away.

My answer would be:

I have a plan. I’m not taking away the dirt to make your life miserable. I’m not taking away your dirt randomly and thoughtlessly. I’m taking it away to make room for something new, something beautiful. Be patient. This takes time. Don’t focus on the tubs of dirt you are losing. Focus on all that you still have. And trust me. I know things that you do not. I will finish what I started and complete my purpose for this part of your yard. Actually it’s my yard, and you will not miss the removed dirt once you have the new things I’m putting in that space. You will understand one day and you will rejoice with me.

***

Have you ever wondered why things you loved, things that were a comfortable part of your life, were taken away? Why God would take them from you but not from others?

I’m not talking about things like losing a loved one through an accident or illness. I’m talking about things like reading gothic historical fiction books or participating in some church practices. Or like watching horror movies involving demons. Or like anything to do with dragons. Things you know He has made off limits to you but seems to have not forbidden them to anyone else that you know.

God always has a plan. And never is this plan about hurting us. His plan is always for good. Sometimes it’s to make us more like Jesus and to bring us closer to Him, or to make us more effective in the things He calls us to do. Other times His plan is not even about us but we are affected by it and He uses it for our good.

One day, years after giving my life to Jesus, I began to have a twitch in my heart every time I read one of my gothic historical romance books. Not sure what that was, I continued reading until the day it became clear that the twitch was the Holy Spirit gently telling me, “no”. Sadly, I packed up my numerous books and donated them to a thrift store.

Not long after that, I started getting the same twitch when watching horror movies with my husband, brother, and sister-in-law –something we enjoyed each time they came to visit. Not all horror movies, though. People fighting monsters was okay. But people attacking people was not. And anything with demons was a definite no. Yet, my family seemed to have no issue with any of  the movies.

Over the years, potential mentors, some church practices, compromises and half-truths joined the list. Either they were taken from me (friends moving away) or I had to take the steps to eliminate them myself. One of the hardest ones of all was my dragon collection. I loved dragon statues and dragon books. I had to give them all away.

The thing was, no one else I talked to was getting these same restrictions. All of the above was fine for them. Why weren’t they fine for me?  

Through years of prayer and research, I discovered that there were various reasons but most stemmed from a prayer I had prayed early in my Christian life. “Lord remove anything that comes between You and me, no matter how painful.”  He has honored that prayer. Quickly or slowly, He removed things that became more important than Him, things that caused me to compromise my integrity, things that tainted my faith in Him, and things that I trusted in rather than trusting in Him. Each time He removed something, He filled the space with something else, including a greater sense of His presence or knowledge of His character.

It has not been easy or fun, but it’s been worthwhile.

“Lord, continue to remove anything that comes between You and me, no matter how painful.”

***

PS. There is nothing sinful about dragons. They are beautiful and some of my favorite books are written about dragons. But the deeper I go with Jesus, the more committed I get to His Word, the more trouble I have enjoying anything that represents the enemy. Satan is seen as a dragon in the Bible and thus I can no longer have anything to do with them. Or at least that’s my guess on why I had to give away my whole collection of Dragonrider books.

And the great dragon was thrown down, that ancient serpent, who is called the devil and Satan, the deceiver of the whole world—he was thrown down to the earth, and his angels were thrown down with him. Revelation 12:9

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Scriptures:

“Prove me, O LORD, and try me; test my heart and my mind. For your steadfast love is before my eyes, and I walk in your faithfulness.” Psalm 26:2-3

Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your path. Proverbs 3:5-6

So that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith – that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may have strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with the fullness of God. Ephesians 3:17-19

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Jeremiah 29:11

For my thoughts are not your thoughts neither are your ways my ways, declares the LORD. For ass the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts. Isiah 55:8-9